Ever (aged 3) has been attending Horse Boy playdates for the past three months with his Mom and Dad and 2 year old sister Maebe. They are a lovely, close knit family who in their application form stated that they were looking for something the whole family could do together. Something they rarely get the chance to do because of Ever’s rigorous playdate schedule.

Ever (aged 3) has been attending Horse Boy playdates for the past three months with his Mom and Dad and 2 year old sister Maebe. They are a lovely, close knit family who in their application form stated that they were looking for something the whole family could do together. Something they rarely get the chance to do because of Ever’s rigorous playdate schedule.

Tyler is a four year old boy who came to his first playdate in August and has been coming on a weekly basis ever since. In her initial email to us his Mom, Emily, wrote the following:

My son has autism and we are having a really hard time ‘breaking through’.  He is 3 ½ and he doesn’t speak.  We have tried all sorts of therapies, in home and in a center and he has a really rough time connecting and we haven’t made much progress in about a year and a half.  She suggested I reach out to you … can you help?

At his very first session Tyler was only interested in books in the house but his mom Emily was stunned because she said he usually tantrummed in the afternoon. Every afternoon. He didn't here. In fact Emily said that her husband had said he thought it was a terrible idea to bring him out here at this time of day.

The next sessions Tyler spent the majority of his time dropping stones into a bucket of water. He was not that interested in interacting with our staff members and volunteers and only touched the horse, Betsy, once. When it was time to leave he was very distressed which his Mom told us was a common reaction to transitions.

Over the weeks Tyler began to interact with us more but still showed little interest in the horse, preferring to explore the woods on foot or splash around in muddy puddles. It took until his sixth session for him to even touch the horse again and we were all thrilled when he did. He was also still becoming very distressed when it was time to leave.

Moses is a young adult on the spectrum who has been coming to us every Saturday morning for the past three months. He was introduced to us by a family member in a last ditch attempt to get him to abandon his computer for a few hours every week and interact with the outside world. Moses is one of the first members of a relatively new program we now offer called ‘The School for Gentlemen.’ This program is aimed at helping teenagers and young adults on the spectrum transition into adult life by teaching them what we call ‘university level’ perspective taking. Topics covered include how to deal with the opposite sex, how to be interested in others and how to dance the complex dance of relationships and career outside of the family. And so far it seems to be working. According to Moses’s Dad since starting this program he is turning a corner and at places where he was previously not welcome due to his energy and behavior he is now a person others are looking forward to have as part of their group.

As well as helping with chores (such as trail clearing and animal feeding) and learning social skills Moses has also been volunteering at a playdate with one of our families who has a much younger child on the autism spectrum.

Here is what they have to say about him and his participation in their playdate:

‘Moses is a great addition to our family playdates at Horse Boy!  My “typical” boys in particular love seeing him when we visit.  He is a talented builder and has lots of expertise with LEGOs, which is the most favorite topic of my 5 year old.  He is a bona fide computer guru and can talk to my 8 year old about seemingly any video game in existence (along with tips and tricks!).  The boys also love playing water wars, sword fights, games of catch, and lots of other made-up-on-the-fly games with Moses.  He is up for anything, always patient with them and always kind.  The presence of “big kid” Moses means that while their brother is enjoying horse time and between their own turns on the horse, the boys will always be happy and entertained.’

Watch this space for updates on how Moses, and the other members of The School for Gentleman are doing. And if you are interested in this program for your own child then please contact This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it..

Studies have shown that having a child with autism in the family can have a significantly negative impact on parental and sibling psychological well-being as well as family functioning in general.

In recent years clinicians have begun to advocate the use of family based, as opposed to child based, interventions for children with autism and other developmental disabilities.

This is in part because factors such as social support and non-conflicting sibling relationships can serve as protective factors for the parents and siblings of children with autism.

Additionally studies have also shown that high levels of parental stress and anxiety as well as intense feelings of isolation and loneliness will not only cause intense psychological distress to the parents of children with ASD but will also negatively impact the child themselves.

For this reason one of Horse Boy Method’s most unique and powerful features is its focus on serving the whole family.

We have found time after time that if you take care of the siblings and parents of a child with autism as well as the child themselves then the impact we can have on a families’ life can be significant. Below is an example of one such family.

The Autisitc Son

Marie (not her real name) has been participating in Horse Boy activities for the past 2 ½ years. She is 7 years old and was when she came to us diagnosed with PDD-NOS and selective mutism.

The PDD-NOS diagnosis has since been taken away.

Marie's first encounters at New Trails

When in 2009 Marie first started coming out she was a very different child to the one she is today.

At this early stage she rarely made eye contact and would not engage when spoken too, she would also self-stimulate by sucking on her cloth elephant George or tensing her body into a stiff legs/back body posture and would avoid all body contact with anyone except her father whose shoulders she would want to sit on all the time.

In addition Marie spent the majority of her time in a parallel existence watching from afar rather than interacting with the other children or volunteers.

She also suffered from regular and long lasting meltdowns.

Because of her anxieties she also did not – at this stage - interact with the horses much, instead preferring to play with the smaller animals like the goats, rabbit and guinea pigs.

However her father reported to us that when she went home she would draw and talk about the horses, naming them all and following what was happening to them. An integral part of The Horse Boy Method is that we always go at the child's pace and never push them to ride until they are ready but instead have the horses in the background for when the child is ready. We were therefore happy to let Marie come to the horses in her own time.